I think of a relationship the same way as I think of a flower. How can you “create” a flower? A flower “happens” when you remove the restrictions that prevent it from “happening”. The presupposition is that the flower “wants” to grow and you can only facilitate the conditions for it to grow, all by itself, by removing the hindrances.
You don’t “build” a relationship by using a hammer and nails, but by planting a seed and creating the conditions for that seed to emerge on its own.
The same goes for love.
Yes, I agree, you could labor a relationship using superficial appearances and acting as to make-believe. But this would be superficial. Superficial is also insubstantial, and a relationship that’s not based on substance is not a real relationship.
Did you find that the idea of Expecting something to happen is actually making you disappointed, frustrated or irritated when things
don’t go exactly the way you envisioned? This reveals a hidden attachment to that particular outcome and that you just became “needy”.
And, when you bring “neediness” into an interaction, you already lost.
If you couldn’t make it to the call (especially my friends from Europe) and if you want to listen to the recording of the Radio Show, you can find below the link for it.
I think it was a good show, I know the guest personally… he’s a good guy and he know what he’s talking about…
or download it directly from here:
Also, I made available a few key chapters from my upcoming book. If you have questions about what you read, feel free to comment on this post and ask me:
I’ve been a bit nervous at the beginning (it was my first interview “in direct”, at radio), but then I became Present, I Connected with myself and I focused only on “what would be relevant for the listeners”.
I hope you’ll enjoy it!