How I Feel is none of my business

 

 

As human beings, we furiously want to Feel Good.

So – when we label a feeling as “Not Good” – we go the extra length to “put it off” or to “get rid of it”. We treat those so-called “Not Good” feelings as a Mistake that the Nature forgot to correct (so now We do it in her place).

But what if All Feelings (“good” or “bad”, however you want to call them) have a different and more important purpose?

 

****

Links:

Website:
http://www.hearttoheartselling.com/home.html

YouTube – More Options Coaching channel
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLPFflBdhQmo7HjLIlSQ-gQyihhXq6lRSG

YouTube – Heart to Heart Selling channel
http://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLPFflBdhQmo6vzHNi3Tx1AMoYb0OALPhc

Blog More Options Coaching
https://youhavemoreoptions.wordpress.com/

Blog Heart to Heart Selling
https://salesengineeringblog.wordpress.com/

Facebook
https://www.facebook.com/cezar.cehan

Linkedin
https://www.linkedin.com/in/cezar-cehan-3613b11?trk=nav_responsive_tab_profile_pic

Advertisement

Meditation – should I stop my Thinking

 

I found that many people talk about Meditation in terms of “stop your thoughts”, or “you have to sit down for one hour daily, with your eyes closed, without thinking”…

In teaching people about Meditation or Mindfulness, the most common
“objection” that I hear is that “it’s difficult to just sit there, with my eyes closed, because that’s when I start Having Thoughts, and I Feel the urge to do something more useful” (well, something along those lines…)

I had the same experience, in the past. What happened for me, though, is that I realized that Meditation or Mindfulness is Not something that you do for one hour and then you resume your habitual way of being for the rest of the day… Rather, Meditation is something that you [can] do all day long, or at any moment you feel like…

… just by Observing without Judging…

It will feel weird at the beginning (because we still Identify with the Thoughts we might entertain at a given moment, or because we still take those Thoughts as telling us something about the future). You will have the impulse to “do something”, as response to those Thoughts … Well, look AT that impulse and Don’t “do” anything about that impulse, neither. Just “Observe without Judging” even that tendency. “Observe without Judging” yourself having that tendency (notice for yourself “oh, look, I started to get worried”)

After a while, you will love the easiness, the stillness, the peace that will grow more and more inside you…

Try it out and see what happens… It won’t “take time” out of your day… It won’t include “more things to do” on your [already busy] list… Just bring a different quality to the “doing”, by noticing that you are Not “the thing that you are doing or thinking about”… noticing that you are “something” who “Does the doing or the thinking”…

That, in and of itself, it’s a moment of enlightenment, of Presence, of Connection…

 

PS. here’s a nice metaphor…

Techniques addiction – What if Connection comes first?

 

 

 

Techniques are in big demand nowadays – we’ve been led to believe that this is what we need – a good technique, if we want to accomplish anything. Anytime we find ourselves “in trouble”, the first thing we focus on is “what is the best thing To Do in order to get to where I want?”

Question: What would need to be true for us, to do that – to look for a way ‘to operate UPON a particular situation? To look for what to Do, rather than what to Be, for resolving it?

Obviously, we need to see ourselves as Separate of that situation and of the other people involved. We want a particular outcome to unfold and we use techniques to control the external circumstances to make that possible. We start from the presumption that what makes that outcome possible is a particular external circumstance. Thus, we focus on controlling the external circumstances…

 

Paradoxically, however, we live through a different understanding when it comes to our bodies. And, I would say, this understanding works much better and much more effective.

Think of this for a moment…

– you’re standing on a boat, floating through the waves

– you want to walk from one end to the other of it

– however, the waves are shaking the boat

Question:

– are you looking for a technique to control the waves (i.e., the external circumstances)?

– or are you focusing on maintaining the balance of your body, knowing that this is how you increase the chances for you to reach to the other end of the boat? And, even if you use various ‘helping techniques’, you know that their true and first purpose is maintaining the balance of your body, rather than manipulating the conditions, or even than ‘getting there’ – because we intrinsically Know that “walking” is not separated from our body… our body Makes the ‘walking’.

 

I bet that the second answer make the best sense to you…

 

What if this is what we first and foremost need, if we want to create in Alignment to the Natural Order of Things: Balance of the Mind, Presence, Connection?

What if the purpose of a technique is to facilitate for Us to Connect and Become Present, rather than “making Them” behave in a particular way?

What if Connection comes first?

 

****

 

Links:

Website:

http://www.hearttoheartselling.com/home.html

 

YouTube – More Options Coaching channel

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLPFflBdhQmo7HjLIlSQ-gQyihhXq6lRSG

 

YouTube – Heart to Heart Selling channel

https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLPFflBdhQmo6vzHNi3Tx1AMoYb0OALPhc

 

Blog More Options Coaching

https://youhavemoreoptions.wordpress.com/

 

Blog Heart to Heart Selling

https://salesengineeringblog.wordpress.com/

 

Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/cezar.cehan

 

Linkedin

https://www.linkedin.com/in/cezar-cehan-3613b11?trk=nav_responsive_tab_profile_pic